So. I’m starting a novel. I am of two minds about it:

• One, I’m really, really excited. The novel concept grew organically from the last short story I completed, mostly because I fell in love with the characters and became pretty convinced that the concept and world could be a bigger one than I was able to capture within the confines of the short story. There are definite advantages to working on a novel as well—novels are, realistically, the best  (although far from guaranteed, as evidenced by my own first novel as well as the experiences of countless other novelists) way to be able to make a living writing. Also, I really, really hate starting new stories—a personal quirk of mine, becoming a fiery ball of intolerable anxiety as I struggle to find an entry point into my next idea (if I have a next idea, that is).
• Two, I am absolutely dreading being ensconced in a novel. It’s like being in a new relationship. You need to be able to enjoy the honeymoon period while remaining somewhat clearheaded about the fact that it is a long-term commitment that will have ups and downs (and as many of one as the other). It’s also a time gamble, which frightens me to a certain extent—what if I dedicate two years to this project, forsaking other projects along the way—and it sucks? I mean, that sounds truly lame to say, but it’s a very real worry—not that there aren’t things to learn from a failed project, but because it’s a deliberate choice that regardless of the outcome, I must take responsibility for, good or bad.

I think I will continue to write short stories*. I am a short story writer, primarily, always have been, probably always will be. But here—I have smashed the bottle of champagne over my own head to christen the journey. My blog: now with 100% more novel bitching!

*in fact, got two pieces of awesome short story news this week. My very scary entry into the Worst Possible Cover Letter Rant Contest at Poor Mojo’s Almanac(k) took first place and will be published in the Fall. And, my SF story, “Games,” will be in Z.S. Adani and Eric T. Reynolds’ Destination: Future anthology. More details soon.